[Warning: Potentially Triggering Content]
We knew Machine Gun Kelly went through some mental health struggles, but to hear about such a close call so recently is really eye-opening.
The Bloody Valentine singer revealed in his new documentary Life In Pink that he very nearly ended his own life just in the past few months — during his relationship with fiancée Megan Fox. In fact, he was on the phone with her when he went so far as to put a shotgun barrel in his mouth.
The rocker opened up about hitting a low point one night in July 2020 while mourning the death of his father. He said in the Hulu doc:
“I wouldn’t leave my room and I started getting really, really, really dark. Megan went to Bulgaria to shoot a movie and I started getting this really wild paranoia. Like, I kept getting paranoid that someone was gonna come and kill me.”
MGK explained he always kept a shotgun next to the bed. So on this day when he “just f**king snapped” the deadly weapon was right there within arm’s reach. He recalled how he reached out to Megan for support — but that it didn’t help, and he grabbed the gun:
“I called Megan. I was like, ‘You aren’t here for me.’ I’m in my room and I’m, like, freaking out on her. Dude, I put the shotgun in my mouth. And I’m yelling on the phone and like the barrel’s in my mouth. And I go to cock the shotgun and the bullet, as it comes back up, the shell just gets jammed. Megan’s like dead silent.”
What a close call. If it hadn’t jammed, what would he have done?
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Thankfully, it did. And that moment gave him the time to realize “something’s not right.” So he listened when Megan and his daughter Casie gave him a sort of intervention, with each telling him how they felt about what was going on with his mental state — apparently partially fueled by drugs. They told him, respectively, “‘I want to like, see you as my father’ and ‘I want to see you as my husband-to-be’”:
“And I was like, I need to kick the drugs for real this time.”
While we’re glad he was able to quit the drugs — and that he seems to have hit a milestone with his mental health as well — he did sound like he’s tied some of his happiness to Megan. As he said in the doc, she “became the sun” to him:
“That’s what helps me write those songs. ‘Cause it’s just like every fairy tale that they never told you in school … the passion between us is just otherworldly.”
Well, we’re happy for them. But we do hope despite the high highs he’s feeling in his relationship he’s also getting help to maintain his mental health, independent of his love life. Not that the “twin flame souls” will ever break up, but just in case, you know, they break up.
In any case, good on MGK for opening up about all this. It’s not the easiest thing to talk about, and it’s healthy for people in dark places to hear from others with the same issues — particularly those who seem to be in the happiest situations.
We also hope things continue going well not just for his mental health but hers too. We’re sure that phone call was a lot to process.
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
[Image via MEGA/WENN.]